Tag Archives: special needs children

When Do You Find Time To Write?


writing on the road

Working on my next novel while running errands with my dad.

People still ask me how I find the time to write. To them, I’m quite a busy person.

“You’re a single mom with a special needs kiddo, you work full time, yet you have time to write and publish books? How do you do it?”

“Well, I make time,” I say with a shrug. “I love to write, so, I write.”

True, I have my hands completely full with my daughter. Being a special needs parent is a full-time job in itself, but I wouldn’t change a thing.

I’m often approached by aspiring authors telling me that they don’t have the time to write, yet they want to write and publish a book. If you want to be a writer, then be one. Don’t sit on the sidelines saying how you wish you could be one. Make it happen. Authors don’t find time to write, they make time.

Authors don’t find time to write, they make time.

I was going to college full-time, working part-time, volunteering, taking care of my daughter as a single mom, and helping my grandmother. In the middle of all that I had written and published three books; one of which was a novel.

I have been able to remove ‘attending classes, studying and doing homework’ off of my plate, but my plate is still full. Between IEP meetings (I’ve had 6 this year so far), meeting with someone from the school (a weekly event, if not daily), school events, afterschool events, daily life requirements of housework and errands, work (the main money-bringer), I still find thirty minutes to an hour, sometimes more, to write. If my daughter is at school and I’m off work, that’s plenty of time (8 hours, give or take time out for lunch) to write and get my errands and housework completed.

Being an author is a job.

Since starting my new job last year, I have had nothing but time to write, that I have made it my second job. Being an author is a job. You not only work on your next book, but you have to promote and market the work that you have published. How else are you going to earn an income from your work if no one knows it’s out there?

However, I tend to spend a lot of time writing than I do marketing. That could be a good thing or a bad thing. I’m writing more, which means there will be more published works out there. The more you have published, the more your work will be noticed. I had also decided not to market as much until I had more published works out there.

I’m not saying all of this to brag, honestly! I’m trying to encourage others to make the time. I once used to look at published authors, wishing that I, too, could write and publish a book. I decided to tell myself that I could.

I started writing my novel, Chaos when my daughter was a few months old. I kept pushing it aside as I lacked the motivation to continue. My grandmother became my cheerleader, in a way, urging me to keep going. She knew I wanted to be a published author. I’m glad I listened to her.

Now that she is no longer here, I find myself thinking about her and what she would say each time that I need that little boost of encouragement. Or, I see the pride in my daughter’s eyes when she takes my children’s picture book to school to show everyone that her mommy wrote it. That right there is all the motivation I need.

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Reblog: Confessions of a Special Needs Parent


I found this blog post on a Facebook group for special needs parents. Though it’s an old post, you can tell that parents of special needs children continue to search for our sanity, as well as answers. Yet, we find friendship through those who are familiar with our day to day lives. We find strength. Sometimes, we may find humor. Also, a smile may be rendered in there somewhere.

Why else would someone re-post an old blog write up? To share that we are out there. To give us strength. To also show that some of our kiddos share similarities. To help spread the word that are children are just that, children, no matter how many awkward stares we get, no matter what society thinks of our children, no matter who’s whispering negative comments behind our backs.

Most of us realize that our sanity may be the first to go, but we replace it with knowledge. Knowledge of who our real friends are, knowledge of our level of patience, knowledge of what our family members truly think of us, knowledge that our kiddos are actually something truly amazing.

Another thing about a special needs parent, we never give up, on anything, and we become stronger every day. We also stick together, as we understand what it is we go through every day.

Our family members and close friends may leave us because they cannot understand our kiddos, yet we find friendships in others, bonds, proving to ourselves that we aren’t alone.

Hugs to all those special needs parents out there, continue to stay strong!

Reblog: Confessions of a Special Needs Parent

Getting Closer To Animals


Since I’ve been having my daughter do hippotherapy (horseback riding therapy), she’s been more calm and relaxed around animals to the point of getting close enough to pet them. This is not just horses, but it is also cats and dogs. We don’t have pets here at home because my grandmother doesn’t want them, so animals are not a part of my daughter’s natural environment. But since I’ve been taking her horseback riding regularly, she’s becoming accustomed to animals and is even seeing that they are actually okay to be near. Normally she would start screaming excitedly and try to get as far away from whatever animal she sees. If I am holding her she will try to climb up me to prevent whatever animal from jumping up and touching her.

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This weekend I watched her walk up to a horse and pet it without me saying anything to her. She did the same to a couple of cats. One of my parents cats was sitting at a window, looking outside, my daughter sits right next to him and looks outside with him. My daughter even laid on a coffee table next to my sister’s cat and let the cat stretch out towards her.

To some this may seem odd that I am even talking about it, but to me these are the small steps that I have to take in an every day life with an Autistic child. Small steps are even considered giant leaps, depending on what the situation is.

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Today, I was approached by one of my daughter’s teachers on how to help my daughter in some of her meltdowns. I was so happy that she had asked me, because I know how she is at home, she is going to be the same way at school. There’s a long list of things I have to instruct people on how to deal with my daughter, that are in her every day life, such as daycare. It’s good to see that she has people at her daycare that are willing to help my daughter and are willing to work with her.

I, as a mom and as a person who was bullied at home and at school, am concerned about my daughter’s future when she starts school. I do try my best to have her ready, but it’s the small steps that are necessary in getting there.