Tag Archives: daycare

In search for the right daycare


Since I’ve been told my daughter is on the Spectrum I have been curious. Curious on how she would be treated, how she would fair in a regular daycare, how she would get along with other kids who aren’t on the spectrum. It is a fear of mine for her to be held back because of how delayed she is. But what people don’t see is how smart she is. She knows her colors, letters, shapes, how to count to at least fifteen. She can even count to ten in Spanish. She’s non-sociable with kids around her age only because she’s used to being around her older cousins. She is particularly hard to deal with for some people when it comes to them not knowing how to communicate with her. She isn’t that verbal and when she is, some people have a hard time knowing what she’s saying. This leads to meltdowns. I’ve been approached many times on how to deal with this when she does that, or how do I do this when she does that.

Well, some of my fears have come true. I found out a few weeks ago that she’s been held back in her daycare due to the fact that she’s still in diapers. Instead of being in the classroom with the 3 1/2 and 4 year olds, she’s in the classroom with the 2 year olds. Why had I not paid attention to this sooner? Well, with the high over turn in teachers, and the fact that she was moved around twice since putting her back in daycare a few months ago, had me thinking she was in her proper class. I did not find out she was in with two year old until I was signing her field trip form and it had what class she was in. I was not happy and even expressed this. Because I can’t get her to be fully potty trained, this causes a problem with the daycare she’s in.

This past week one of her specialist handed me a list of daycare’s to look at. These are daycare’s that have pediatric services. Daycare’s that have qualified teachers who specialize in areas for kids with special needs, such as Autism, down syndrome, delayed development, etc.  I have checked out at least two of them on the list and one of them I like already. I especially like that it has proper security measures, such as a door you have to push a button to request getting in and press a button to get out. At my daughter’s current daycare you can just lean on the door and it opens without issues. This becomes a problem with me as my daughter is a runner. She has on a few occasions gotten right to the busy street before I catch her. I swear I lose five years off of my life each time she heads for that door.

Upon checking out one of them, the one that I like the most, I have seen so many things that would benefit my daughter and her sensory needs. For the past month she’s been giving everyone a difficult time due to the fact that she’s in need of sensory input and I just so happen to be picking her up after a few hours of her having a lengthy meltdown. No one knows what to do for her when she has a meltdown, nor do they recognize that she’s even having an meltdown or the fact that she’s requiring some sensory input. Instead, they put her off to a corner and tell her to play by herself. At the daycare I checked out the nurse giving me the tour showed me all kinds of sensory toys. Thinks for yoga balls, slides, trampolines, ball pits, special swings, you name it, they had it and my daughter will benefit from these items as I’m sure she’ll be using them on a daily basis. This will also help me when I come to pick her up, as she won’t be cranky and out of emotional balance.

This daycare also has a wonderful staff that I had the joy of meeting. Their classrooms were much bigger and situated differently than the daycare my daughter is in currently. I noticed immediately that I was in a classroom for children that require structure and stability, something that my daughter needs. Actually I think every child needs structure and stability. I was also told that she will be placed in a classroom with her peers. I think my heart leaped with joy when I heard that. There are a list of other things that I liked with this daycare, though I still feel the need to look at a few others before I make my final decision. I’m sure I’m already biased in picking which one I want her to go to already.

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With Autumn Comes…


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She’s sick, but still feels well enough to act silly

It’s already the end of the month, well, not the last day of September, but almost. I love Autumn. I love the beautiful colors in the trees. I love the cooler weather. I love football. I love wearing scarves and long sleeve shirts. But what I don’t love about the change in weather and this time of year is that everyone is passing some sort of cold or flu around.

Yesterday I took my daughter to the doctor. She had gotten up in the middle of the night throwing up. First thing I checked was if she had a fever…she didn’t. With a quick change of bed sheets and her clothes we went back to bed. There were a few close calls (almost throw up) that morning, but she insisted on going to school…seriously, I was going to let her stay home, but she threw a fit, wanting to go to school.

Upon dropping her off I told them that if she gets sick to call me, that I had to go to class, but I will pick her up in a few hours. Once we got to the doctor’s office she started throwing up. I truly feel bad when she feels bad. I calmly rub her back, hold her hair, then tell her everything is going to be okay. What I love about my little girl, is that no matter how ill she’s feeling, she always continues to keep a smiling face and keeps acting her silly self. I know she gets that from me.

Turns out she only has fluid built up in one ear and looks to be a minor ear infection…I caught it early. The fluid drainage just causes her to throw up. I am just thankful she doesn’t have the flu or something worse, though what can be worse than having the flu?

I hope everyone is doing well and stirs clear of whatever bug is going around. I’m trying my best to stay away from those around me with the sniffles. There had been a few people already leaving class early because they didn’t feel too well, nor did they look it. Lots of fluids, rest, and healthy eating.

Another Morning Meltdown


Every morning, for the past few weeks, my daughter has been having these meltdowns when it’s time to get out the door. Since she has to have one specific toy to take to daycare with her, I already have it sitting with my book bag, all ready for us to grab and go. Now she doesn’t want to just take that one toy, she has to search for more to take, which takes much longer to get out the door. I’m lifting bed sheets, looking under the bed, through the toy box, in the doll house, around the TV, just looking for one specific toy she has to have. You may think this is just too much, that I should just let it be. But how would you handle it? If I didn’t let her take this specific toy she’ll immediately throw herself on the floor and begin hitting herself…yes, these are her meltdowns. I’m not talking just light slaps, she has her hand in a fist and hits herself in the head or on her arms.

It doesn’t stop there. Once we found this toy, she runs outside and tosses it off the porch then sits down hard and begins to cry and hit herself because she wants the toy she tossed. I’m uncertain to how I should handle this but to go pick it up and give it to her. That only makes it worse as she wants to be the one picking it up. If I were to pick it up and hand it to her, her screams get louder and she hits herself harder. I then start to get embarrassed thinking the neighbors are probably thinking I’m hurting this poor child. I’m not physically hurting her and I won’t.

I’m at a lost for how to handle this situation. It makes me late for class each day, no matter how early I get us up and ready. She’s also become resilient in having me change her clothes. She refuses to use the potty anymore, so it’s back to diapers, to which she won’t let me change.

It’s like every month a new thing in her Autism emerges and it tests me to how I can cope or to how I can handle it. Some of the things I can handle and have showed her teachers at daycare how they too can handle the situation. But now it’s getting to a point I’m just stressed and completely worn down to tears and feel like having a meltdown myself. I know that can’t be the option. I have to stay strong and keep trudging and pray that I get through the rest of the day.

My daughter is only 3 1/2 but will she grow out of this? Or will it get worst? Parents with Autistic children I’m seeking your help, direction, tips, encouragement in how to handle situations such as these. What do you do to help your child get ready in the morning? Do you have a special routine? A particular way of going through your morning to insure a meltdown doesn’t happen?

Getting Closer To Animals


Since I’ve been having my daughter do hippotherapy (horseback riding therapy), she’s been more calm and relaxed around animals to the point of getting close enough to pet them. This is not just horses, but it is also cats and dogs. We don’t have pets here at home because my grandmother doesn’t want them, so animals are not a part of my daughter’s natural environment. But since I’ve been taking her horseback riding regularly, she’s becoming accustomed to animals and is even seeing that they are actually okay to be near. Normally she would start screaming excitedly and try to get as far away from whatever animal she sees. If I am holding her she will try to climb up me to prevent whatever animal from jumping up and touching her.

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This weekend I watched her walk up to a horse and pet it without me saying anything to her. She did the same to a couple of cats. One of my parents cats was sitting at a window, looking outside, my daughter sits right next to him and looks outside with him. My daughter even laid on a coffee table next to my sister’s cat and let the cat stretch out towards her.

To some this may seem odd that I am even talking about it, but to me these are the small steps that I have to take in an every day life with an Autistic child. Small steps are even considered giant leaps, depending on what the situation is.

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Today, I was approached by one of my daughter’s teachers on how to help my daughter in some of her meltdowns. I was so happy that she had asked me, because I know how she is at home, she is going to be the same way at school. There’s a long list of things I have to instruct people on how to deal with my daughter, that are in her every day life, such as daycare. It’s good to see that she has people at her daycare that are willing to help my daughter and are willing to work with her.

I, as a mom and as a person who was bullied at home and at school, am concerned about my daughter’s future when she starts school. I do try my best to have her ready, but it’s the small steps that are necessary in getting there.

Slowly Breaking Habits


My daughter, from about the time she was one, has always had to carry a toy or two, or a bucketful along with her to the car. It didn’t matter if I was just driving down the street to the bank, she still had to have her toys with her. And if I were going into the store, she had to take her toys in with her. If I didn’t allow her to take them, it would create a meltdown.

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Let’s see, I got my sippy cup, airplane, giraffe, little lamb, and dinosaur. Did I forget anything?

There’s only been one time where I couldn’t allow her to take a toy into the store with us, as it was her big plastic dump truck. I can understand why she loves the thing, it is colorful, it’s a big cool truck, and it can carry more of her toys. But I’m not sure the store’s employees or security team would see it that way, especially if she tosses it out of the buggy a few times and I relentlessly give it back to her, rather than leaving it where she threw it.

When I say meltdowns, some people just think, oh it’s just a toddler thing. But to those who have Autistic children or have worked with them know how Autistic children can be when it comes to needing that particular toy or item. Autistic children can either be very smart or the complete opposite. They don’t understand feelings, like if they hit you, they don’t know that it hurts. They can’t understand why they can’t have a certain toy, or a cookie before dinner. This leads to a meltdown.

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They all want to go for a ride too, Mommy!

My daughter has a Sensory Processing Disorder which means certain things feel funny to her, or she doesn’t like it if you touch her hands, or feet. She can’t stand the feel of mud on her skin, or silly putty, or anything that feels wet on her skin (unless she’s taking a bath or swimming in the pool), her reaction is to quickly wash whatever it is off of her.

She also has the tendency to hit herself when she has a meltdown, sometimes even bangs her head against something, mostly the floor. When I say she hits herself, I’m not talking about a light tap, she has her hands in a fist and literally hits herself in the head or her arms, really hard.

She has a wonderful group of therapist that see her each day. And I had the chance to see what all they do with her this past summer. By seeing how they work and her reactions I’ve been able to continue the same process with my daughter myself. Like drawing, coloring, helping her with her shapes and colors, puzzles, playdoh, the list is endless on the amount of activities and all to continue to help my daughter throughout the day.

Most recently we’ve been working on keeping the toys and stuffed animals in the car, instead of taking them in with us. I think she started doing this when I started taking her swimming this summer. I told her calmly that we couldn’t take all of her toys with her, but she could play with them once we got back in the car. I began to notice that she started leaving her toys in the car when we took our trips to the store and now when I drop her off at daycare in the mornings. She still has meltdowns, but not when I ask her to leave her toys in the car.

Back to School for Daughter and Me


This past Monday I put my daughter back in daycare, as this coming Monday I go back to school (college). I put her in a week early so that she and I both get re-accustomed to getting up early and getting back into the routine of things. I’m not sure about her, but I can tell already that I dislike getting up at 6:30AM versus 8AM.

ImageMonday, like all Monday’s, was going fairly rough for the both of us. I couldn’t get her to get up, couldn’t get her to eat her breakfast, and couldn’t get her to get dressed. I was finishing getting ready myself and come to find her curled up in my bed. I snuggled up beside her for a few minutes and calmly told her that it was time to go back to school and play with her friends. She had finally started to get dressed and we were out the door almost an hour and a half later than I had planned on leaving. This is the reason why I started her back to daycare a week early.

ImageI took her back into the same classroom she was in before summer break. She seemed to fall right into the same class routine without a problem. She even waved bye at me instead of wrapping both her legs and arms around me, not wanting me out of her sight. I waved at her one more time before I let myself out of her sight, then headed out the door. I had a long list of things to do before I headed back to school Monday.

We had a great summer full of so much fun. I think I’m going to need a bigger can of red bull to start each day with next week.

I’m a toddler and I’ll cry if I want to


Dublin has been seeing a speech therapist; actually the therapist comes to visit Dublin at her daycare. Since Dublin doesn’t talk that much and has a hard time with words, or asking for something, or doesn’t have much of a vocabulary, she has to visit with a speech therapist once a week. I was told that after next week the therapist will be seeing Dublin twice a week, she didn’t explain to me why. I have seen a little improvement in her speech as far as using actual words when she talks, rather than babel.

Today when I picked Dublin up from daycare the therapist was still there, giving Dublin her lesson. One of the teachers directed me to the room they were in and I poked my head in the door to see how they were doing. I could tell right away that it wasn’t going that well long before I reached the room as I could her my daughter crying. The therapist looked up from my daughter to see that I was standing in the doorway and asked me if Dublin usually cried for long periods of time. I told her, yes, sometimes longer.

Dublin is three, so it’s a toddler thing to cry endless for something, especially when you tell them no. No matter how nice I tell her no, even when not using the word no, she will cry and throw a tantrum. The therapist finally told me why Dublin was crying, she wasn’t done playing with a ball before the therapist took it away wanting to move onto another lesson.

Dublin finally calmed down after the therapist let her play with a matching game on her cell phone. At this very moment she is playing a similar matching game on my kindle. I find it keeps her occupied until she decides she’s hungry. When she comes home from daycare I always have something prepared for her to eat, but she begins crying for maybe an hour until she decides she’s actually hungry and will finally come to the table to eat.

I am just now going through the terrible toddler stages. She didn’t have the terrible twos and has only had one week of the terrible threes, which was several months ago. I have been blessed with a wonderful child though, so I guess I’ll see how long this phase will last.